Understanding Hoʻohalahala and Hoʻoponopono.
Hoʻohalahala - To criticize, complain, find fault.
Hoʻoponopono – To make correct.
In today’s world we find so many misgivings and reasons for anger, guilt, and finding fault in others. Often this is a way to deflect from what’s actually going on around us. The word in the Hawaiian language is hoʻohalahala - to criticize, complain, find fault. In contrast, the Hawaiian way of forgiveness and understanding is based on hoʻoponopono
People blame others, trying to find fault in their actions to satisfy a deeply rooted need for resolution of anger. We are looking for answers. The deep-seated and far-reaching need for us to understand how we feel in this life pushes us to find solutions; however, this does not make it pono to strike out against others in looking for fault.
Hoʻohalahala is grounded in fear and anger over past misdeeds. Our need for answers can drive us toward means that are not pono. Hoʻohalahala solves nothing; It is within each of us to find resolution, to recognize that the misdeeds of one cannot be inherited by an entire generation. This is the heart of hoʻoponopono—to find peace within oneself, regardless of the perpetrator's presence. In fact, so much of the time, our inability to resolve these internal conflicts causes our hoʻohalahala, lashing out at an entire group, to be mistaken for racism.
"hoʻoponopono—to find peace within oneself, regardless of the perpetrator's presence"
The fact that westerners came to Hawaiʻi and colonialized us is not a reason to have hoʻohalahala toward all foreigners. We may exercise caution toward those ignorant of our culture, but we should not harbor hate. The fact that colonizers went all over the planet and destroyed or tried to change so many cultures does not justify one’s hoʻohalahala toward all. That is not to say that those atrocities were right. We may still harbor anger or even disbelief at the injustices. It simply means that we must understand that the descendants of those people are not to blame. Our anger cannot carry on to those descendants else we are no better than those of the past.
The horrible things that continue today — war, anger, even schoolyard bullying are more than unacceptable. They seem to have been normalized. These things have direct causation. Individuals who are responsible for these acts and the people who are impacted by them. To acknowledge that these specific individuals and their acts are wrong and to see that they are the perpetrators is not hoʻohalahala; It is the recognition of truth.
Our place in this world is to refuse to accept the narrative that what is false is actually true. Right is right and truth is truth. This is understanding. One bad cop does not make all cops bad, and one racist or even a whole group of them does not make all people racists. We cannot place blame on many for the acts of a few.
It is not only those of us who feel wronged who need to understand. It is also the ones who continue to contribute to the hate and violence who must learn to see the light of peace. Those perpetrators, too, feel the need for hoʻohalahala — they need an enemy and someone to blame. They too will learn that not all people are responsible for their anger or guilt. They too must find peace.
These are not hollow words.
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These words are true. True also is the fact that you are one of the few who never ,to my knowledge, acted with prejudice toward others. Even when it would've been easier if you did!
Thank you my dear Brother. You know that the path is through pono. Bullys and beratement go nowhere. Nor does blame. Only Aloha will show the light. Mahalo again Guy.
Aloha Nui Loa